Journey into the Unknown

Finally at almost 28 I have made the decision to leave home.  Many of you will think about time (not least my parents! Lol!)  University had been a holiday from home really as I only stuck it out 3 months at Newcastle and ended up doing an Open University degree later.  Therefore this was to be my first real break from home.  My parents hadn’t even as much as moved house during my lifetime so to me this was somewhat of a big deal.  Not only would I be leaving home but I would be living with a boyfriend for the first time and moving areas to be further fromLondon.  Would I actually manage it this time after numerous failed attempts; I think my family were placing their bets shall we say.  There had been the attempted house purchase with my ex some 7 years ago which my cold feet for had probably finished off the relationship.  Then even in this current relationship I had said I would move in Christmas 2009 but I had backed out for want of being engaged first.  Then we were halted again the Christmas just gone when a hospital trip meant that the decorating of the bedroom was not finished.  All of these of course had some how been used to create an obstacle to the leaving home. So now we are here and I needed to pack but I kept putting it off.  Suddenly watching daytime television was all important.  My parents were also losing my brother at the same time virtually and I think despite the problems we both cause at times, Mum was rather sad to see us go.  As I looked round my room, I wondered where I should start in packing up my life.  It’s amazing how much stuff you actually accumulate.  When you start to go through it, old memories are aroused and before you know it an hour of packing time has been wasted looking at photos of drunken nights out and reading letters.  How would my boyfriend react to my shoe collection?  Maybe I should leave some at home and introduce them gradually.  Was it appropriate to take my childhood doll?  Anyway eventually I managed to pack some bits; amazingly the drawers were still full despite a suitcase full of clothes.  When it was all done, I looked around with some sadness and realised this was it, I was to wave goodbye to my childhood once and for all.  As my boyfriend drove us away, tears pricked my eyes.  I knew it was stupid and I couldn’t expect him to understand.  I was looking forward to our future but was grieving for my past.

One thought on “Journey into the Unknown

  1. “How would my boyfriend react to my shoe collection?” <— love this! I literally LOL'd. I hope y'all are enjoying your new place!

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